


Light & Dark

by ununpentium



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-08-28
Updated: 2011-08-28
Packaged: 2017-10-23 04:23:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/246248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ununpentium/pseuds/ununpentium
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sherlock had known this day was coming from the very beginning.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Light & Dark

He got inside my head. No-one had every truly managed that before; yet here he was. I carried him around through my every waking moment. I saw his smile on the faces of strangers and I heard his laugh every time I closed my eyes. He had _invaded_ my head, and if he could have that much power over me, well, what if I held the same power over him? What if I, Sherlock Holmes, had taken up residence inside John Watson’s head? Did he think of me as he fell asleep? Did his heart beat faster every time he saw a stranger on the street wearing a long coat and a scarf, hoping it was me? It wouldn’t stop there, though. If I had managed to get even a foothold inside John’s head, then I would worm my way in through the cracks and take hold like a parasite. The thought of that made me recoil, the thought that John Watson’s mind would become polluted by my existence. John is the light, the pure, the whole. I am the dark. I take away and I contaminate. I poison.

Our limbs were tangled together on the bed sheets; John was arching underneath me and moaning softly. I raked my eyes across his face. So unguarded. So _John._ I bit into the soft flesh of his neck and he threw his head back, exposing more. I held onto John like he was my anchor, that without him I would shatter; break into a thousand pieces. John’s breath hitched as he rolled his hips upwards, seeking more friction. I thrust into him harder, screwed my eyes shut and claimed his mouth in a bruising kiss as he came, shouting.

I watched him as he lay there, panting, a small smile playing on his lips. He was saying something but I couldn’t listen; chose not to hear. He lay there for a few more minutes, hands lightly stroking up and down my back, before getting out of bed and padding down towards the shower. He would be back in nine minutes; he was nothing if not efficient. I cleaned myself roughly with a discarded t-shirt, threw on my clothes and reached underneath my bed for my suitcase. I had known this moment was coming right from the beginning. The day John moved in I had known how it would end. I could see how pure he was, the way we contrasted brilliantly; light and dark. John would say that light beat the dark, light would seek out the darkness and completely eradicate it, filling it in completely. I knew differently. I knew that the light escaped into the dark and could never be put back. I knew that I had to leave and never, ever look back. It might just kill me, but it would save John. He might not realise it yet, but he’d come to understand.

I stood up, suitcase firmly clutched in my right hand. I took a final look around my room. _Our_ room. My forensic science books were jumbled up with John’s medical journals; one of his jumpers was neatly folded next to a discarded shirt of mine. I took a deep breath and walked out, through the lounge and down the stairs, my heart screaming louder with every step I took. I opened the door and paused; I could hear the blood pounding in my ears. _I’m doing this for you, John. I am doing this for you._ I stepped over the threshold, shut the door behind me and turned right onto Baker Street. I didn’t look back.


End file.
